(nine things that never should've happened to sailormercury)
deliquesce \del-ih-KWES\ intransitive verb:
1. to melt away or to disappear as if by melting
2. to dissolve gradually and become liquid
i. [a line allows progress, a circle does not]
she was seven, solemn as a prayer. it had been two years, four months, and seventeen days since her father had left. it was a somber tuesday afternoon. her mother was still at work, but had forgotten again to leave one of those bright yellow notes that signified another late night, Ami knew anyway. she had finished her homework already, actually in school, and had read two books since coming home. her mother's crystal china candlesticks were beginning to get dusty, but they still reflected the lamplight like soldiers; tomorrow, she would clean them. now she was having supper, it was the routine. get home, close the drapes, turn off the radio from the alarm clock in her mother's room, do some homework, take a break and make some sandwiches, do some more sandwiches, clean up and then start her seperate and equally important bedtime routine.
it was now seven o'clock in the evening. it had been two years, four months and twelve days since her father had offically left. it would be ten months, twenty six days and five hours until her eighth birthday. after she had finished her sandwich, (tuna, all there was left in the house) and had multiplied it into all sorts of forms from the twelve triangle pieces, she decided to get into her pajamas early.
it was seven days until her next phone call from her father was due. it had been three calls since her mother had stopped talking with him, now, her mother would only stare out the window when they heard his familiar voice on the answering machine. this house had pretty windows and a prettier view; when she was younger, her father would say that nights like these were his favorite. he would say that the sunset got stuck in the atmosphere and was waiting for somebody to come with a net and catch it up. she thought that if she had a net now, she would rather catch something more practical than a sunset. (but her cute stars-and-moon pajama pants were on, just in case)
ii. [a poetic retelling of an unfortunate seduction]
she haunted the walls of the palace, like she was trapped in a prism, except now more material. it had been nine hundred years since her second tour of duty, the people in this city don't age, the people in this city don't change. every five years, they would need a recleansing of the poorest areas, and then she would go back to her post at the computer. statistical improbabilities, now. moniter the dark moon, moniter the planet's core, moniter the growing Princess, and the King's blood pressure and the vital statistics of the other inner senshi. things don't readily change in this palace.
last week, the Queen had unveiled her new memorium, the seventh of its kind, this one was to their past lovers, sometimes Mercury wondered if the Queen even remembered that part. there was no rememberance that she needed now, the present was endless. she never dwelt upon the Silver Millennium, although she heard that it had become quite the popular bedtime story for all the faithful little girls.
(and Their love was so all-powerful that even the Princess's four beautiful guardians and the Prince's four handsome protectors fell deeply in love, and stayed that way until the evil forces of Beryl tore them apart. but their love was so strong, that noone will ever fall in love with another until the end of time)
iii. [don't know when but a day is gonna come]
it was looming around her like one of Rei's ceremonial necklaces, somewhere between her collarbones there was the dread. "the future is coming," she heard Michi say during one of their swimming dates, when she thought Ami couldn't hear, "it's reflecting madly from my mirror, I don't know how Pluto..."
and that was three days ago.
she had tried at first to spend the time with her friends, the typical apocolypse behavior, but upon further consideration had rememebered the structure of Crystal Tokyo. sometimes she was sure that she was the only one who could recall their trip, the way it was always met with silence. does silence mean acceptance now? she didn't even really need to choose; those women in that tower, that was her destiny.
now she tried to swim, to look up and memorize the clouds, studying was useless. everything had become useless now.
she had dreams underwater, and woke up choking on it. the time was due to come, no matter how hard Pluto tried to deny it entry. she could feel the electricity of impending attack under her fingertips whenever she turned her head. it wasn't the destiny, this time, it was the waiting period.
iv. [exaltation on a cool, kitchen floor]
his mouth was hot and insatiable against her, and she arched to meet him. this time, he'd said, he was determined to please her "right" and had immediately descended upon her. three orgasms later, she just knew that he would be aching for his turn. she twisted her body as far around him as she could, wrapping her slim legs around his slim hips and pulling herself on top of him. entwining her fingers in his wild hair was a better idea, and made it much easier to bend down and kiss him. there were shockwaves where their lips met, she was trembling all down her over-sensitized body and back up again. his eyes were too green, almost burning her and she had to close her eyes against his so she almost barely noticed when he moved his mouth down from the lovebites at her neck to her breasts. she was out of control in seconds, the begging words just about ready to spill from her mouth and peppering kisses all over wherever her mouth could touch. she needed him, she needed him.
v. [falling out of love at this volume]
she was most definitely and absolutely not going to think of him outside of this room. there was enough trouble as it was, with the Princess going off with that rogue prince and deciding that she just didn't care anymore about keeping the pretense... and now the men were off at war with that upstart, the army was fighting against the same upstart, but seperately, the alliance was fighting with itself over stragety, the queen's elite council was heard arguing and echoing all throughout the day. the Queen and the Princess were not speaking now, after the Princess had refused to stop seeing her secret beau. and now, the Princess was fighting with them all collectively, callously disregarding her safety during a WAR. this was a war, there were causalities in the war. the Princess was too important to be a causalty.
that was why this had to stop. she shouldn't have taken him as a lover anyways, it just made the parting more and she was not going to mourn the loss of their relationship, especially not with some crazy terran-boy whose eyes lit up in the most amazing emerald color. kisses were kisses and she was going to stop now, her Princess needed it.
vi. [I won't ever be happy again]
the enemies were gone and Usa had Mamoru. and Pluto had the gate, and Saturn had the future and 'Ruka and Michi had each other. and the inners had a couple of memories out of context, frayed around the edges and told around the sacred fire.
(he had the greenest eyes, and he used to grab me by the waist just a little too hard and pull until I was off balance and on his chest. he smelled like sandalwood and something else, and he would stare at me with those green, green eyes until I had lowered all of my defenses and then he would kiss me. I don't really remember any of the kisses, though...)
vii. [method acting]
she was twenty-seven and a doctor, attractive in a slim way, very streamlined and elegant, living in Kyoto. she had an apartment with her boyfriend, tall and lanky with piercing eyes and strong hands, and the thickest mane of curly hair. they would occasionally go out for kareoke, if he came home from the university early; and every friday night, he would cook for her.
her name was Ami, and she would never get married. her boyfriend's name was Zoisaito, and he was a drunk. whenever he'd have one too many, he'd beat her. she would never carry his child. she would never leave him, and they were in love.
but sometimes, she'd have these dreams after lovemaking where she was a superheroine, flying about the streets of Tokyo destroying youma and finally conquering love and justice.
viii. [something vague]
she was sure that she wasn't doing what was intended of her when she had awakened, but she knew it was better. she had absolute power over her little section of the world, minions that feared her, and a voracious lover to share her bed, not to mention the always perfectly styled hair and sexy wardrobe.
she lived in a palace underground where she could feel the ground shake with her mistress's might. she was perhaps the luckiest soldier in the whole damn place, and she loved to flaunt it. no other senshi had a full lab complete with subjects to experiment and a computer database all to herself, she loved it.
except, to occasionally humble her, Metallia would show Mercury what might have happened, had she dropped her floppy disk on the floor one day. and afterwards, she'd get a cold drink and screw Zoisite until she realized just how damn lucky she was to have everything she could've ever wanted.
ix. [when the curious girl realizes she is under glass]
Luna said that they may never get their memories back, that they shouldn't force them out or force them in. she had wanted them to only relax and meditate, leave the control to the unknown. she certainly wouldn't have approved of the late night talks between the girls, where they would hoard the memories and then hand them out like trading cards or henshin pens to be treasured. Ami had so precious little now, from being awakened after Beryl and the first evil had been defeated.after sailormoon made the long lonely journey to the moon and back. Usa-chan said that there was nothing too special about them, she knew everything since she had seen, that the first had really only been old enemies from the past and nothing else, Usa got angry whenever she would talk about it too long.
she tried not to think of the memories like she had in the beginning, dissecting every little bit that had returned, trying desperately to find the meaning in them. there were nothing but the bare skeletons of cool nights and love for her princess. sometimes, though, the loss would creep up heavy on her and it would feel like someone had chopped out her lungs and replaced them with sandpaper.
she had her ways of dealing with it. she was like Rei in that, in her boys. they would go out to clubs together, pick out the fine-boned blondes and bring them home. she was on her seventeenth, now, living far enough away from Usa to avoid the suspicion of constantly changing boyfriends, this one had messy hair and green, green eyes, and at the point of climax she was sure that she had felt something. but as soon as she had caught her breath, it was gone.
author's note: definition by dictionary.com, section headers are song titles by Bright Eyes.
I do not own Sailor Moon and am making no profit from this fiction.